"YOU ARE NOW ENTERING PORTLAND- PLEASE WATCH YOUR STEP!"
Congratulations Portland! You used to be known as the city of roses. Now, you are just known as the city of rosy cheeks! Meet America's newest 3rd World City where you are never far from the next bathroom. Portland has become just another 3rd world city run by Democrats.
In Portland, make sure you watch your step because objects look closer that they really are. Toilet paper not included!